Life in Christian-Conservative T̶e̶x̶a̶s̶ Barbados

Replace ‘Lubbock, Texas’ with ‘Barbados’ and this says it almost perfectly. 

This small island-country is pretty much the Bible-Belt of the Caribbean. And if life in Lubbock Texas seems contradictory and confusing, life here is equally as paradoxical.

Behind the facade of dread-locks, sandy beaches and sunburnt tourists - the Caribbean is a strange blend of extremely conservative Christian culture and fairly liberal behavior. 

Similar to the USA, the majority of Caribbean people identify themselves as Christian (around 75% ).

However, while Christianity may be the predominant religion, many African religious undertones remain. Around 80% of Haitians, for example, profess to be Catholics, while half of them also practice voodoo.  Jamaica, the definition of ‘Caribbean’ for many Americans, has held the Guinness World Record for the most churches per square mile, despite being the birthplace of Rastafarianism. 

For Barbados, however, the situation is somewhat different. 

Frequently described as ‘Little England’, Barbados has a distinctly less African culture and Christianity. Unlike all the other Caribbean islands, Barbados remained under English rule throughout it’s colonization until it’s independence 45 years ago. As such it retained a very British flare; every bajan knows how to play Cricket, every hot beverage is called ‘Tea’, and there is even a Trafalgar square (now renamed), complete with a statue of Lord Nelson that was erected BEFORE its better known British namesake. 

The Church of England has been well at home here.

With over 95% of the population identifying themselves as Christian, Barbados is frequently self-described as a ‘Christian Nation’.

And in true ‘bible-belt’ fashion - it shows:

There is no talk of separation of Church and State. ‘Prayers’ is an integral part of morning assembly at every public school, and ‘religious studies’ was a mandatory class during my public education. I distinctly remember the priest that taught us spoke very slowly and always seemed unusually sleepy - some suspected he was filled with the spirit (the liquid variety).

In keeping with our ‘Christian’ ethics, it’s illegal to say a swear word on stage at any performance, or on any radio station. In fact, it’s technically illegal to swear in public at all, ever. The award winning movie Black Swam was initially banned by the censorship board from playing in cinemas. (They eventually gave in an let it, however).

Throughout my education, I never had a science teacher who taught or believed in evolution, it was always mentioned as a silly idea that some scientists somewhere else have.  

Here, birth certificates still list children born outside of wedlock as ‘bastards’, and homosexual acts are illegal,  subject to a life sentence if anyone ever decided to enforce the law.

Yet in this country where there is a church on every corner, across the street you can usually find a Rum Shop. There is no enforced drinking age and there is no law against drunk driving - “If there were, how would all the politicians get home from the rum shops?”, some say.

Crop Over/Kadooment is a nationally orchestrated party day for ‘bacchanal’, and the 22nd of February is officially “Rihanna Day”. In fact, Rihanna - the ‘good girl gone bad’, is the appointed ‘Cultural ambassador’ for this ‘Christian nation’. 

This dual-faced religious culture runs deep in Barbados and rears it’s head frequently. Bible verses are thrown around like ‘big rocks’ on the call-in radio programs whenever hot topics like homosexuality, prostitution or the death penalty come up. Yet, somehow, issues like the rampant child and domestic abuse here are swept under the rug. In one breath, ‘Christian’ morals must be enforced since it’s our culture and in the next breath other things are also ok because it’s our culture.

Life in Barbados has taught me a couple of things as well:

1. Many Christians suffer from a really bad case of ‘keeping up appearances’. 

Because most Bajans consider themselves Christian in some way, it’s very important for them to feel like they are keeping the ‘good ol’ days’ alive, and not succumbing to the crazy liberal ways of the modern developed world. 

From this perspective, part of what it means to be Christian is to know what the accepted ‘Christian’ position is on a handful of big issues and stick to your guns. In this context the rationalle that ‘this is the way things have been for hundreds of years’ is somehow irrefutable. This is the default posture taken and defended whenever one of the tried and true ‘Christian positions’ is challenged. The assumption is that the past is always seen as good or better, and the present/future world as a looming danger to fight off.

At all costs the appearance of Christianity must be maintained through these mantras, even if they are not understood. Which leads me to the second thing I’ve learnt. 

2. Some christians will fight tooth and nail for ideas they don’t seem to think through and don’t seem to understand.  

*I’m going to put a disclaimer on this one - some people have thought through, and do understand their positions on the ‘big issues’ and still hold the traditional posture.. but I don’t think this is the norm. 

The problem of parroting.

(photo by Express Monorail)

My husband and I live out in the ‘country’ of Barbados, surrounded by lots of trees, fruits and animals. Some of these animals include several caged parrots belonging to our landlord. Early on a morning trucks come to collect the bananas our landlord cultivates to deliver them across the island. As a result, ever so often when we pass by these caged parrots we hear the eerie ‘beep beep beep beep’ of an invisible reversing truck. Without knowing why the truck beeps or what it means this parrot has developed the habit of warning us of an approaching reversing vehicle. The parrot is saying something, without knowing what it’s saying or the implications of what it’s said - only because it has heard it repeated over and over.

Unfortunately, I  think many Christians, especially those in ‘bible-belt’ culture, suffer from parrot syndrome far too often - we hear something repeated over and over throughout our lives until we start to repeat it ourselves. And this is what leads to that ‘Lubbock Texas’ christianity which tells people  that “God loves you” and “you’re going to burn in hell” or that  ”sex is an awful, filthy thing” and so you should save it for someone you love. 

A “Parrot Christian” squaks out that a homosexual couple should be imprisoned while having two outside women, and a ‘child mudduh’.  Parrot Christianity praises the imprisonment of a young person caught with a spliff, but justifies the drunkenness of the judge that convicts them. It is ‘pro-life’ but supports punishment by death because it’s in the ‘good book’. It argues with Muslims that want to institutionalize morality, but turns around and does the same thing.

Maybe it’s my cynicism, my pride or my ignorance - but I’m tired of ‘keeping up appearances’ and defending the ‘the Christian positions’ at all costs.

I’m tired of it’s hypocritical results and empty logic. I’m exhausted by the opinion columns before I even read them or ‘brass tacks’ philosophy.  

I’m tired of the Bible-belt. It frustrates and discourages me. And yet, like Barbados, it’s a part of me. 

Life in Barbados has taught me two things; Forget appearances - it’s the reality of the way things are that really counts. You have to let go of your ‘positions’ on issues in order to really see them for what they are and think them through. Who knows - things might even start making some semblance of sense then…